A little note on doing rather than being..

Again its been ages since I wrote something..

Winter is coming here in England and I feel the darkness more and more.

The urgency reflected by transiting Pluto square to my natal Moon seems to be slowly fading away and I am still trying to see clearly what is left within myself.

Perhaps the seasonal darkness can help me making sense of who I am now; but lately I have had people coming to visit and stay with me and its been difficult to spend quality time on my own.

My brother came to visit this weekend. He is gone now and I am feeling a little nostalgic and somewhat sad.

5 years without going back to Brasil or seeing my parents starts to weigh on me I think..

I have a few ideas for new talks and a short course on astrology that I want to put together for early next year, but the darkness and emotional digestive process that I am going through now seem to be holding me back a little.

Is funny how much we seem to have lost touch with the natural processes of gestation and death, with the natural cycles of life.. with the seasons..

Our conditionings, that are supported by technological discoveries (electricity for instance), tells us repeatedly that we should be productive at all times. It tells us that only summer is great, with its long days full of laughter and social times.

It tells us that only the fruit is great, and that we should be ripping them constantly. But what about the seeding? Or taking care of the soil? Those activities are not as glamorous in our society..

I am writing this post in an attempt to dialogue with the voice in my own head that keeps nagging me for not being productive enough.

The darkest time of the year is supposed to be the time to go inwards isn’t?! A time for recoiling and pondering everything that has happened so far and identifying where you’re at in the process of becoming..

This is the time for reassessment and hopefully deeper understanding… why so much pressure to be doing things all the time?!

 

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A few words on Jupiter in Scorpio

So much has happened since the last time I posted something here.

I am trying to keep the discipline and write more, but somehow it isn’t working. I feel like I have gone to an extreme of disciplining my daily routine and now Im going a bit to the other end of wanting to be free and not restrict myself so much.

Since Jupiter has moved into Scorpio I feel like a shift has happened and it looks like I am taking the study of the Occult a bit more serious.

It was interesting to see Liz Greene (Gosh, I still need to write at least one blog post about her workshop that I went to!) speaking about the split that Carl Jung had between the scientist and the mystic in his psyche.

Well, I feel that I too have a similar split. On one hand the academic historian that wants to be respected and do some serious intellectual work, and on another hand, the thirst to explore the mysteries of the occult and develop the imagination.

But now with Jupiter recently entering Scorpio I do feel a stronger impulse to explore those hidden areas, perhaps even to develop my magical powers?!

I am note sure, but I am enjoying this energy at the moment, and I am looking forward to explore and see what this transit will be reflecting.. and I feel that another few steps towards empowerment could be one of the best potentials here..

I do enjoy the Scorpio season.

 

Colourful Symbolism..

I have been really busy lately, a lot of inner changes taking place and a few short trips.

But I felt the urge to try coming back to writing again.

I have recently gone to a training course in theatre and the experience was quite powerful (I have a strong positive feeling about mixing astrology with theatre!).

Ate the end of the course we performed Macbeth, a play that strongly reflects transiting Pluto’s last almost exact square to my Moon, happening now.

The hero’s journey into the underworld.

A descent into the darkness.

I came back home feeling that there is much to integrate from the whole experience, and obviously, also much to be integrated from my personal descent into the underworld in the last few years. (whilst Pluto transited my Moon)

And yesterday while I was dancing in my room I had this vision about practicing astrology like I would paint a picture.

In my experience, when I tried painting a picture with too much rigidity I never felt quite happy about the result. It was only when I understood that the colours should blend with fluidity that I started to truly appreciate my art work. I started to feel freer to experiment and something quite unique would come out.

I feel that with astrology is a little bit like that, if you get too stuck with the cookbook type of interpretation you end up too rigid in your interpretation of a person’s natal chart or process of growth. There is no movement or texture. No different nuances.

I had this vision while I was reassessing what happened to me in the last year.

Pluto transiting my Moon has never left the background, but different transits have added different tones and stories to it. Around the time that Jupiter transited my Venus I entered a very Jupiterian relationship, with a very Jupiterian character. (from Venus, transiting Jupiter then moved towards making a conjunction to my Moon)

A lot of the themes in the relationship was very much about Jupiter, but, Plutonian themes were also a strong part of the whole thing.

I can almost see this on a canvas!

We can’t really separate one from the other with clear cut. Think about painting with watercolours, about how the colours blend and mix in a unique way..

Now try seeing astrology in this way.

 

Multifaceted transiting Pluto..

I just came back from visiting my boyfriend in Wales.

He is staying at an Ashram on the top of a hill in the countryside.

With Neptune activating a strong configuration in his natal chart, which includes his Moon, he has decided to go on a journey in search for home and his purpose in this world.

He is also a number five in numerology. And so am I.

My knowledge in numerology isn’t very vast, but I know a little about number 5 being strongly connected with freedom and travels (which in turn, in my astrological mind, resonates with the archetypal energy of Sagittarius).

This visit has given me some food for thought.

As Pluto slowly makes its way back in the sky (in our perspective), heading to form the last almost exact square to my natal Moon, I realise that the huge transformation (which includes my search for home) hasn’t finished with me yet.

The strong call I felt in the beginning of this transit, back in early 2015, to go and live in a community of like minded people came back to me rather strongly while I was in Wales.

Living in nature and gardening almost daily, chanting and practicing yoga together, sharing the space with people that are somehow in a similar wave length felt closer to home than being in the city.

Eating fresh food from plants that you can potentially form a relationship with, by caring daily and communicating with them, gets you in touch with your centre much more than going to supermarkets.

We really are what we eat!

I know that one of the manifestations of Pluto transiting my Moon in the last few years has been a big and gradually change in my diet and relationship with food. (This is my second month experimenting with/eating Vegan food and the awful period pain that I used to get every month has improved a lot.)

I now have the feeling that I will be going back to the road in a few months.

But it is interesting to see that the earlier feelings of destruction and despair inside me has given place to something else, a stronger “Me”, so this is a different phase in the process of searching for home.. and I somehow look forward to it..

A few words on the next Full Moon Eclipse..

Im back home in the UK now and can’t help but feel overwhelmed by I am not even sure what (?).

This is the second month that I can feel very strongly the energetic build up of the full Moon and I try just watching it without getting myself too involved in it.

As I take a look at the full Moon’s chart for Bristol (where I currently live) I can’t help but notice Pluto, placed very closely to the ascendant, still making the exact square to Jupiter while Venus in Cancer moves closer to forming a T square.

To me this feels like a big stretch up for transformation, the transformation (potential growth) of our relationships (Jupiter in Libra) linked up with a somewhat survival agenda (Pluto in Capricorn opposite Venus in Cancer), and/or perhaps questions like how much do we depend on our relationships in order to survive will be brought into light.

I see issues of boundaries, individuality and togetherness being triggered.

Jupiter is the apex of the forming T square and it also aspects both the Moon and the Sun, by respectively a trine and a sextile, seeming to hold the key to all of these conflicting and apparent opposing forces.

What is the feeling connected with Jupiter in Libra?! What can be the key possibly held by this symbolism?!

My take on it is: relationships that promote equality and growth!

With the building up of these energies we can potentially see codependency being strongly challenged.  (an issue not taken lightly by neither Aquarius or Leo who symbolises the axis connected with individuality and the specialness/uniqueness of each individual..)

Also this full Moon, happening at 15 degrees Aquarius (opposite the Sun at 15 degrees Leo), does make me think of issues connected with belonging and our sense of alienation being activated.

The Sabian symbol for 15 degrees Aquarius is ” Two lovebirds sitting on a fence and singing happily.”

This somehow resonates with what I have been feeling regarding this lunation and I can’t help but think that the two lovebirds are sitting on a fence not on a tree or something else, they are sitting on a fence which has division and separation at its core purpose I suppose..

This full Moon is also a lunar eclipse and I see eclipses strongly connected with turning points. It feels like a portal that once crossed there is no way back.. not that we would want to go back necessarily…