A sense of calling..

I just felt the need to come here and write for a bit.

Is already 12:31 AM and Im having trouble sleeping.

Im not sure exactly what is going on but I definitely feel charged with an extra amount of energy which I need dispelling..

Today was sort of a day off that I have given myself (even though I have worked a little on my blog) but now I am rolling in bed from one side to another having astrological ideas and mini insights.

I am currently reading James Hillman’s “The soul’s code – In search of character and calling” and can’t stop thinking about the idea of having a “daimon”. The author is basically defending the hypotheses that we are all born with an intrinsic call, a soul or spirit guidance, to become something.

He calls this “the acorn theory”, “which proposes that each life is formed by a particular image, an image that is the essence of that life and calls it to a destiny, just as the mighty oak’s destiny is written in the tiny acorn”.

I am thinking about that in relation to astrology, in one sense about how astrology can be helpful in finding the thread of our “destiny” (what we were born to be according to the archetypes in our charts), but also in the context of my life and my own calling.

Yesterday’s talk was truly refreshing and inspiring.

It felt like I belonged there in that place of sharing insight/knowledge/stories. It was like actualising something strong and deeper, something somehow bigger than just a desire to be a teacher.

Im not sure if I can convey in words that certainty, that feeling of somehow being back home and revelling in my element.

It felt great though.

Now, at this peculiar “insomnian” sleepless moment to me, I can’t help but have ideas for the next talk that I want to do….!

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Subpersonalities and Astrology

I have been truly busy.

I guess that’s no news since my last post (or maybe the one just before the last?)

I remember talking about how much I’m actually enjoying the energy that the entrance of my progressed Moon into Capricorn is reflecting at this moment in time.

Focus, grounding, practicality and the enjoyment of doing what needs to be done.

But everything has two sides, and yesterday I just realised how much I’ve been under the grips of my animus. The masculine in me has been repressing and beating my feminine up big time.

The realisation came after a heated argument with my boyfriend about statistics and astrology that went wrong.

Why was I so strongly attached in defending my point of view like that?

After crying a little and consequently allowing the feminine energy to flow back through me it was clear that the man inside me was just becoming a bit of a tyrant..

And going back to the magical ways that astrology works… right when my boyfriend left, a bit pissed off, I straight away went back to working on the 3 months forecast that I was writing to one of my clients before he arrived.

As Im back to the writings, feeling still quite angry myself, I realised that I was speaking about the Moon activating my client’s natal Chiron in Gemini opposing Mars in Sagittarius when my visitor interrupted me..

I have Chiron in Gemini making an opposition to Mars (conjunct Uranus) in Sagittarius myself and I knew that this configuration, which is the symbolic representation of my animus as well, was being activated at that very moment with the recent argument..

Not only that.

I then became aware that this configuration was somehow overtaking me in the last few days and I wasn’t sure what was going on, why I wasn’t feeling quite right, until that moment..

And now Im also reading a lecture by Howard Saportas on Subpersonalities and psychological conflict.

So interesting!

Seeing each different configuration in the astrological chart as one of your subpersonalities fighting for attention or sometimes possessing you..

Timed by transits and progressions, or perhaps activated by the influence of another person’s presence (which you can see with the synastry), these are the moments that you have the opportunity to reintegrate them and move further ahead on your individuation process.

So today, to bring balance, Im making a point on embracing my feminine energy again.

 

Beginnings

It’s been couple of weeks since I made my decision to focus all of my energy into my astrology work.

I see the progress that I did not manage making before, when I had another job to distract me. There is also definitely the question of the rigth timing involved here.

We just can’t force things to happen.

With my new sense of commitment and seriousness about my profession, symbolically reflected by my progressed moon in Capricorn (which I’m truly enjoying at the moment), I’ve accomplished a few little things. There are some readings lined up for me to do, there are some that I already did, also finally got myself an insurance and a membership that will allow me to see my clients at the wellbeing centre in Hamilton House, and finally got 2 little talks on astrology lined up as well.

A lot of exciting things unfolding since my conscious decision followed by action taking.

And I’m loving the feeling of freedom to focus entirely on my passion..

I have even filled much of my spare time with reading my astrology books again as I want to perfect my practice and, by doing that, provide a much better service.

I’m loving it.

I recently went back to finish reading Geoffrey Cornelius “The moment of astrology” and the insights it is providing me are truly valuable right now. I’m finding his discussion on astrology as divination and the way he speaks about the nature of symbols fascinating and refreshing at the same time.

I feel that the path I was already naturally taking with my interpretation of the symbols, a much more fluid and intuitive one since Neptune opposed my natal Sun and Mercury, is strongly connected with Cornelius’s ideas discussed in his book.

His ideas are also almost like giving me “permission” to be creative and to flow with what I feel when seeing an horoscope. It is helping with my confidence and belief in what I do, something that I’ve been struggling with for a long time. (I have also been taking Larch for over 2 months now, the Bach flower remedy to help with confidence)

Geoffrey Cornelius speaks a lot about the intrinsic relationship between symbols and the act of interpreting it, and how important for us astrologers to be conscious of the “creative and participatory dimension of interpretation” (…)

Here is a few more words on that that I resonated strongly with:

“We should not imagine when we take up a line of interpretation that it is the bottom line, or the final and best interpretation. Rather, it is the interpretation that we have taken up in the light of a particular question that we are concerned with, in a particular context and at that moment in the client’s life. The best and truest interpretation is what the client needs to hear now.” (pp. 222)

Great stuff.

I’m also receiving my new laptop this week and I will then be more present around here with my writings.

Uranic individual

 

Shifts that have no end.

In the life of someone who has a strong Uranus in the natal chart, shifts and changes can happen quite suddenly. (There are different ways of measuring if a planet is strong in your chart: by house, aspects or sign as well)

And I have quit my job at the cafe quite unexpectedly (even to myself!), ironically on 1st of May, the international workers day.

It was the first time that I left in the middle of service, and I have to say, it felt good! (Specially having  Mars conjunct Uranus in the first house, with Mars ruling the 6th house of job)

When we insist on doing something that doesn’t allow us to be ourselves Uranic energy can be a way out. We do have to be mindful not to “throw the baby with the bath water” but Uranus has also a connection with the process of individuation.

The process of becoming your authentic self by freeing yourself from conditioning and heading towards uniqueness.

I won’t be developing much more on that right now as I’m preparing for a job interview today.

Fingers crossed.

And I also have a reading to do later on.

With no title

Once again I’ve left such a huge gap between now and my last post. So much has happened..

I’m gonna keep myself free to just write about what I feel truly matters at this moment in time..

On 29th of march I went for a 10 day Vipassana meditation course. 10 days in silence, without almost any distraction, and learning how to meditate for around 10 hours a day.

That was intense. Life changing.

I’ve been meditating 2 hours a day since I came out from the course and I feel that something in me has massively changed and  in a very fundamental level.

I am also still taking a selection of the Bach flower remedies (have I told I’ve done a level one course about the remedies?!).. big changes, massive healing…

At the moment (for a few weeks already) my progressed moon is transiting my natal Neptune and I consciously chose this period to learn how to meditate. Although I’ve practiced yoga consistently for a year, meditating has always been a real struggle.

I guess this is the reality for many of us living in an overly stimulating world. Our minds just go wild and we don’t seem to have any control over it.

Transiting Saturn is also crossing over (more precisely about to cross over) my natal Neptune. Good time for getting serious about spirituality, good time for developing discipline and consistency in my spiritual practice.

This is the way I’ve been using my knowledge in astrology. And it seems to work..

Finding creative ways of working with the symbolism, brainstorming what could be the best potential for those flavours..

Aiming higher..

(I still haven’t bought myself a laptop so will stop here, for writing in a small tablet is tiring..)